Weekend Update Part 2 {Online Dating Edition}

Better late than never!

So I was scheduled for two dates this past weekend, one Friday night and another Saturday afternoon.

I had been emailing back and forth with Friday Night Man for a week or so, he seemed nice, he's my age, a graphic designer in the area, and said he had a break from work on Friday night if I was available. I didn't have any plans so I said sure. I asked where he wanted to meet, and he suggested the local mall.

Food court.

Um, hm.

This didn't sit well with me- going on a date to the local mall food court on a Friday night. But being someone who hasn't gone on a date in years, who am I to complain. I agreed.

Saturday Afternoon Man and I had been emailing for about a week, and unfortunately he's not my ideal- nine years older than me and has a child. I know that as time goes on the chances of me meeting someone without children are smaller and smaller, but a girl can hope, right? So I begrudgingly agreed to coffee at 4:00 on Saturday afternoon at a local coffee shop.

Friday came around, and I went to dinner with my Dad (with Mom out of town visiting my sister, my Dad often turns into my dinner date) and then was early getting to the mall. I went to a few stores to check out what they had killing time until 8:00. Of course there were students everywhere. I avoided a good three of them while perusing the stores waiting until 8:00 sharp to head over the food court. At 8:00 sharp I made my way over to the food court.

There was no single gentleman in sight. What the eff?

I looked around for a minute, and then walked into adjacent Macy's to check out the shoes. Then returned to the food court to check again. Nothing. So I walked up to the movies and waited there until 8:05 where I decided one last time to check out the food court.

Nothing.

At this point I've spoken to three students and I've reached my limit. Anxiety is setting in and I'm done. So I leave and when I get to my car send him a message saying that I waited but didn't see him so I was heading home. Punctuality is a must in my book (MFT you're exempt from this) so I was annoyed. When I got home I saw a message from him saying he was at the pizza place, I think it was sent at 8:08. I wrote back and apologized for not waiting longer but that I felt uncomfortable with all the students around. He understood and suggested we try again. I wasn't upset at all that this date didn't happen so I'm not in a rush to reschedule. I have a busy schedule for the next few weeks so I said once I return from visiting my sister we may try again.

Or not. I'm not worried about it.

Date Number Two of the weekend was supposed to take place the next day. I went to Pound class at Mind Body Barre in the morning, and decided that I was going to take a trip to a nicer mall about a half an hour away, later that afternoon. When I got out of class my Dad had called, and was planning on picking up my brother who goes to college near the mall, and taking him to the mall as well as to a late lunch. Free meal and a trip to the mall not on my gas? Done and done. So I texted Saturday Afternoon Man around 11:00 and told him that I was going to have to cancel our coffee date, and I apologized for the inconvenience. I felt bad, but at the same time, wasn't super psyched about this date to begin with, so I didn't feel heartbroken. A dear friend reminded me of a very fitting MBB mantra which freed me from further guilt about canceling, "Work smarter, not harder." I took that to apply because of his a.) Age b.) Having a child c.) Having a borderline mullet in a few of his profile pics, that I really shouldn't be working this hard to date just anyone. Keep my standards up, and that's what I'm doing from here on out.

By mid-week this week I was even considering canceling my month subscription to the dating site early. I didn't get around to it yesterday, and when I got home from watching XFactor with my Mom, I saw I had an email from someone on the website. I checked it out, and was pleasantly surprised. He's seemingly attractive, my age, also in education, local, and used proper grammar and spelling in his email. I allowed myself to get a little excited and replied about a half hour later.

Truth be told though, I'm a little apprehensive as he seems too good to be true based on prior experience with the website, but I'm reserving final judgement for the time being. On this front I shall obviously keep you posted on any updates!

Weekend Recap Part 1

So. Hurricane Sandy has cancelled school today and tomorrow and I figured at the least I could update my blog while I lounge at my parent's house for the next day or two.

First. I did a little bit of shopping this weekend. I knew J.Crew was having a sale on their sale items- an extra 30% off sale items. There were some things I had my eye on online, but knew I needed to try on before purchasing at final sale. Plus, since seeing a post about these jeans on Sequins and Stripes {I thought, can't seem to find the post right now to refer to, although it should be noted, I love her style and coordinated outfits very much}, I've been wanting to try them on since I'm in need of a good pair of skinny jeans.

So. First stop was Nordstrom. I tried on the Paige Skyline Straight Leg jeans and fell in love.

Purchased.

Next up was J.Crew. I scoured their sale section, which was pretty full considering it was the end of the 30% off promotion. Because I used my educator discount, I ended up getting an additional 15% off my purchases. I bought two tops and a pair of white bootcut jeans for spring/summer.

Top #1: Blythe blouse for $35. I've been wanting one of these for a few seasons, but never seemed to want to spend the money on one. I couldn't beat the price with the 30% off promo.

Top #2: Nicky top for around $25 {cheaper in the store than online.} Great top for layering in fall/winter/spring at school, and wear alone during summer. I bought a bright red, almost with an orange undertone, which isn't pictured online. 

And last but not least, a pair of white denim pants for, drumroll please, $15!!! Score.

And to top off a successful shopping trip was a stop at the new Pinkberry in the mall for a delicious frozen treat. 

Sunday I tried on the Paige jeans again and questioned the color choice I made. I also was itching to head to Anthropologie which is about 10 minutes past the mall to check out a skirt and a cute jewelry holder. So I headed back to the mall, stopping at Anthro first. 

Sadly the tulle skirt was no where to be seen, and only available online in black. {Separate post about my quest to make my own version of this skirt for the holiday season forthcoming.} And for some reason when I found the wishbone display it was not what I was expecting. I was thinking it was going to be a bigger size item, but was really small, about the size of an apple. So no-go on either of those fronts. 

Of course I didn't leave empty handed!

Anthro was running it's own promo- an extra 25% off all sale clothing items. Unfortunately nothing I purchased I can find on their website for a picture. But I left with two tops, a really pretty bralette, and a dress. Three of those items were on sale, one was not. But I made the purchase anyway.

Item #1 was a sheer floral print short sleeve shirt, that is on the longer side. I picture it with my new skinny jeans and tan heels. Item #2 was a bright floral print sheer bralette that I don't know that I'll actually wear out of the house, but is something that my future new boyfriend may appreciate and it was super cheap so I got that as well. Last item on sale was a pretty navy and tan dress that cinches at the waist, and has a little bit of a mullet cut to the bottom hem. All of those items, with the additional percent off totaled around $50. This brings us to item #4. Eek. So it's a purchase that may end up being returned, but I could not leave it at the store. It's a chambray pullover shirt, that buttons down midway. Cuffed sleeves that roll up and button to stay in place. And has small white polka dots all over the shirt. And is super soft. But was $88. Yikes. I fell in love, but may end up returning because of the cost. We shall see. 

I also tried on a pair of skinny cordoroy pants that I've seen on Anthro's website many times in denim and colored denim, and have been curious how they fit me. Good news is they fit well, so when I see them on sale in the future I can feel confident in making a purchase. 

I then headed back to the mall to check out other colors of the Paige jeans I found. I ended up buying them in black too. 

Mighty successful shopping weekend for moi!! Not so successful on the dating front...that update is next.

Stay safe party people! Will update the dating front shortly...

Someone winked at me!

I just had an alert notification on my phone- someone winked at me on match, exciting!

I open the ap to see who this mystery man is. {It should be noted here that my age is listed at 30, and that I am seeking a man between the ages of 28 to 35. I feel like that's reasonable, no?}

Turns out my mystery man is a 41 year old man one state over from my home state. The information he provided about himself reads:

"Do you 'Love Chocolate' ??? Cause I melt in your mouth, not In your hands ! :):):) Would you like come candy ladies ???"

Thank you for your inquiry with typos and emoticons, but no, thank you.

Eight Years, You Say?

Like I mentioned in my previous post, I've been single for almost eight years. Fun times around here, that's for sure.

Brief recap to how I got to this point...

Dating History:

• 1 Serious Relationship, ended by him much to my chagrin (2000-2005)
• 2 Semi-Serious Relationships
• #1, ended by me (about two months in 2007)
• #2, ended by him (about two months in 2008)
• Sprinkling of unsuccessful dates (spanning from 2008 to about 2010)

*It should be noted that throughout my early and mid twenties I had quite a time going out on the town and making questionable morale decisions. {Attempting to tactfully disclose a slightly promiscuous stage} It was a blast. But I'm not longer behaving like a floozie in her heyday. Moving on. 

So, Serious Relationship was initiated by him and both Semi-Serious Relationships were set up by mutual family friends. Unsuccessful dates were a mix of random set ups and online dating. 

For the past two years or so, there has been a major drought in the field of dating. I tried a few different online dating sites-both paid and free sites- at different times throughout my twenties and didn't enjoy the experience any of those times. But I know people who have had success with online dating sites- some even now married, so I do know it works. Couple the dislike for online dating with my distaste for going out until the wee hours of the morning with the new crop of partying twenty-somethings where I don't seem to meet people anyway, and I have not been on one date in two years.

Two years.

Mostly I'm fine with that, going on the assumption that somehow I will meet the person I'm supposed to be with and more importantly deserve to be with, that it just hasn't happened yet. I'm right where I'm supposed to be. 

But then there are those times where I really think about the reality of the situation: I am 30 years old and have no dating prospects to speak of. People have stopped offering to set me up on blind dates, I don't work with a large population of dateable men, I occasionally go out but don't seem to meet people when doing so, so.......how am I going to meet the person I'm supposed to be with? Enter panic. 

And apparently online dating.

I feel a sense of pressure that I should be online dating. I understand where people are coming from when they ask me if I'm online dating or encourage me to do so. What I have a hard time with is that I have used various online dating websites unsuccessfully, I've paid for a service that has not yielded any results. Yet people continue to prod me into going back online to date.

I've decided that I will try a popular online dating website one. last. time. I will pay $30 for one month of access to online profiles of people who supposedly are also looking for a relationship and see where it takes me. I'd rather buy a pair of black leggings to pair with my new Hunter rain boots with that money, but I am giving it one last shot. If it works out and I meet some great people, awesome. And if it doesn't, I am officially done with online dating, and I can say with complete conviction that I gave it my all, and will move on. 

Watch out Match.com, here I come!

Stay tuned for updates on my experience. I'm sure you're on the edge of your seat already...