Where am I?

Hello! Here's a little bit about me before we jump into this blogging thing....

I turned 30 this year, and was/am in a pretty great place- I have a career I love {teaching history at a local high school}, a home I adore {where decorating is ever-evolving}, the best family and friends anyone could ask for, and a cute-as-a-button {most of the time} Chihuahua. Things are kind of awesome.

Of course there is a minor detail missing which nags at me usually in the deep recesses of my mind, occasionally rearing its ugly head full on, but for the most part, I function unaffected by this missing piece. You see, I've been single for a long time. A very long time. A long enough time to bring me back to my days as a sixteen year old, longing for her first kiss and boyfriend while watching Dawson's Creek and daydreaming about what life would be like with my very own Pacey Whitter. {I suggest if you plan on sticking around here for a while you may want to familiarize yourself with my ideal significant other. Enjoy.} I have been without a significant other, minus a few dates/small relationships, for almost eight years. Yikes. Let's go back to the beginning...

Right after graduating high school the day finally came where I found myself not only experiencing my first kiss {sigh, finally!}, but I was all of a sudden in a relationship with someone which rivaled those I'd seen on the WB! That summer after graduating high school I finally experienced all that a first relationship should be: kisses in the rain, lying to parents and subsequently being grounded {yes, after I had graduated high school}, falling asleep and missing curfew, dinner dates and shopping trips, and the ultimate teenage experience: a tear-filled goodbye as I left for college almost two hours away {oh, the travesty!}

But we managed to keep our relationship going while I was away, and he remained in our home town. I came home every single weekend except one during my freshman year of college. I even transferred to be closer to home (and also to avoid $20k in student loans when I graduated, which turned out to be a good decision) my sophomore year. Our relationship continued, and even led to discussions of marriage and children after college. This was our plan! Junior and senior year I lived in an apartment and commuted to school. Technically he didn't live with me, but he did. We went ring shopping {the sparkly kind}, talked about where we would get married, and even looked for houses. I graduated and landed my first teaching job for the following school year. Things were falling into place!

Until they came crashing down the following February. Very long story short, I discovered my world was crashing down on me, that the person I chose to spend the rest of my life with had chosen differently {in the form of dating another girl behind my back.} Enter emotional breakdown, loss of 20 pounds, and serious bout with depression.

My savior throughout that time was my job. My students made me laugh every single day, and kept me sane. I eventually survived that horrid break up and went on to have a kind of crazy and most definitely fun, rest of my twenties. After the break up I connected with one of my cousin's who would go on to become my forever Partner-in-Crime and we went out on the town like there was no tomorrow! She would sleep at my apartment, and we had the time of our lives! Ohmygosh, so many crazy nights, and so much fun.

I'd say after First Boyfriend, I dated maybe two guys semi-seriously. Both guys I was set up with, and they went well. The first I dated for a few weeks before he left the area for work for two months. We kept in touch, but when he came home I wasn't really into him anymore. Then maybe a year later or so I was set up with another guy by my Aunt, and he and I clicked right away. In hindsight I probably moved too quickly into that relationship, or at least quicker than he was ready for, and he ended that one after a few months. This brought me to my mid-twenties where I was still going out a lot, this time with two close friends from high school, but wasn't meeting any people worthy of dating. I think I got into a bit of a funk with going out, drinking, and making poor decisions.

Things got a little muddled around maybe 26 and 27, and I made some decisions that I'd like forget but they make me who I am today, so live and learn I guess! Dating had ceased to exist for me albeit for a few memorable but not in a good way dates (a set-up, a few online dating dates) and I was starting to move away from the going out lifestyle.

During that time one majorly awesome thing happened- I bought my house! I am in love with it. I was so ready to leave the apartment I had shared with FB and have a brand new, fresh space for myself. My house was built in the early 20th century, which as a history teacher I obviously love, and I am slightly obsessed with the process of decorating it. More on that with subsequent posts I'm sure.

I switched schools also around the time I bought my house, teaching at the high school that I graduated from, well they built a new one, but same town I grew up in. I love it. I miss my old colleagues and my old school a lot, but onwards and upwards!

And so now, at 30, I'm refocusing my journey back on me, as most of the pieces of my life have fallen into place. At the end of last school year I found out about a place called Mind Body Barre. I was a member at a local gym, loved going to classes, but sadly the instructors I enjoyed weren't on the schedule much any more and I found myself driving 15 minutes to use an elliptical machine. Eh, no thanks. So I started taking more and more classes at MBB and actually enjoying working out. Starting July 1st of this year I began participating in their Wellness Program which involves logging food intake and working out at the studio 4-5 times a week. On the spiritual/personal front, there are workshops, Reiki, spiritual readings and one on one consultations with the owner. It is without a doubt one of the best things I've ever participated in.

Slowly throughout my twenties I gained back the weight I lost post-breakup and then some. After three months in the MBB Wellness Program I finally feel comfortable in my body again, and mentally I feel the best I have in as long as I can remember.

One aspect of the MBB mantra is the saying, "You are right where you're supposed to be in this life." I am using that as the platform of this blog, to remind myself that I'm supposed to be right here, and help focus the decisions I make from here on out.

Thanks for reading through all that {if you did!} and welcome! Please comment or email me with feedback.